EP 89: Why I Say No to DEI Programs (and What HR Should Do Instead)
When one of my TikToks about using AI in hiring quietly passed 20,000 views and hundreds of comments, I thought people would be dragging the candidate in my story.
They dragged me instead.
Not because I was unfair in the process. Not because I violated any laws. But because I touched a nerve at the intersection of HR, technology, and today’s culture wars.
That experience is exactly why I’m talking openly about another lightning-rod topic:
diversity, equity, and inclusion (DEI) programs — and why I don’t think we need them to build truly inclusive workplaces.
I believe we can remove formal DEI programs and still be deeply committed to diversity, equity, inclusion, and belonging — by embedding them into the everyday work of HR instead of turning them into a separate, politicized initiative.
HR doesn’t need to be political to be effective. It needs to be compliant, consistent, and compassionate.
The Story: AI, an Interview, and a Viral Backlash
Here’s the quick version of the TikTok story that sparked this episode:
I followed my usual hiring process for a client:
résumé review → questionnaire → 30-minute video screen with me → then on to the client if they’re a fit.I record interviews in Microsoft Teams so I can pull transcripts and reduce bias by running all inputs (job description, résumé, questionnaire, transcript) through AI to validate my decision — not replace it.
In this case, the candidate was qualified on paper, but there were “yellow flags” in how she interacted. My plan was to decline her after the interview.
When I later pulled the transcript, it was way longer than 30 minutes. Turns out she’d stayed in the virtual room, called a friend, and spent about 20 minutes venting about me and the client — while still being recorded.
I declined her professionally as I do with every candidate, closed the loop, and moved on.
Then I shared one simple reminder on TikTok:
“When you leave an interview or meeting, make sure your tech is fully closed before you start talking.”
The internet lost its mind.
I was accused of:
secretly recording someone
being unethical for using AI in hiring
failing to “properly” end the meeting
and not giving the candidate a tutorial on how to leave Teams
Out of hundreds of comments, only a handful were supportive. And that response told me something important:
HR is sitting in the middle of some of the most controversial conversations in business today.
Which brings us to DEI.
The Rise (and Pullback) of DEI Programs After 2020
DEI programs absolutely exploded in the wake of 2020.
Corporate spending on DEI initiatives grew by almost 50% between 2020 and 2022 (cited in a McKinsey report).
DEI-related job postings later dropped 44% in 2023 (reported by Harvard Business Review).
Gallup found that 52% of U.S. employees believe their company’s DEI statements are “just for show.”
So we saw this huge surge in programs, roles, and statements… and then a very real pullback.
What does that tell us?
Many programs were reactive, not strategic.
Employees often didn’t trust what was being said publicly.
And now that some organizations are stepping away from formal DEI, people are angry — even though many didn’t believe in those programs to begin with.
I’m less interested in whether DEI is “in” or “out” and more interested in this question:
If DEI statements felt performative, why were they there in the first place — and what should we be doing instead?
The Hidden Risks of Formal DEI Programs
Let me be clear: I care deeply about diversity, equity, inclusion, and belonging.
My concern is with how DEI has been operationalized inside organizations.
Here are some of the risks I see when DEI becomes a standalone program or department:
1. DEI Language Becomes Politicized
DEI policies often morph into statements about:
gender identity
reproductive healthcare
pronouns
other highly charged social issues
These are deeply personal topics, and people are extremely polarized. When companies present those positions as values, they move HR from compliance into belief-policing.
2. HR Gets Thrown Into the Culture War
When DEI is framed as a moral litmus test instead of a legal and behavioral framework, HR gets stuck in the middle of:
“If you don’t say this, you’re bad.”
“If you do say this, you’re political.”
That’s not sustainable. And it’s not actually what HR is there to do.
3. Cancel Culture Amplifies Fear
Social media magnifies mistakes. One post, one comment, one email taken out of context can explode publicly.
A 2022 MIT Sloan study found that cancel culture creates reputational shocks that ripple into business performance. Leaders know this — and many are terrified to say anything.
Fear does not build inclusion. It builds silence.
4. Political Conversations at Work Are Draining
A 2022 SHRM survey found that 40% of employees say political discussions at work make them feel stressed or anxious.
Stressed, anxious employees cannot do their best work — and employers can’t get their best performance.
What Employees Actually Want Instead of Another DEI Initiative
Most employees are not asking for another DEI committee or mandatory training.
What they actually want from leadership is:
Fairness in how policies are applied
Consistency in how people are treated
Clear communication about expectations and decisions
Respect in daily interactions
Opportunities to grow based on performance, not favoritism
Leaders who tell the truth, even when it’s uncomfortable
A 2023 LinkedIn Workforce Learning Report highlighted that the top leadership skills employees expect are empathy and clear communication.
Not slogans. Not statements. Skills.
So What Should HR Do Instead of Running DEI Programs?
Here’s my stance:
We don’t need separate DEI programs.
We need good HR that bakes equity and inclusion into everything.
1. Anchor Policies in Compliance, Not Politics
Ask: What do the laws say?
Not: “Are you a good or bad person if you believe X?”
That means:
Strong, clear anti-discrimination policies
Comprehensive anti-harassment policies
Legally sound leave policies
Consistency across the board, not selective enforcement
2. Build Behavior-Based, Not Identity-Based Expectations
Your policies should focus on how people treat each other, not who they are.
You don’t need everyone to agree on every cultural issue. You need everyone to behave according to professional expectations.
3. Invest in Leadership, Not Checkbox Training
Instead of another one-off DEI training, invest in:
Leadership development around empathy and communication
Manager training on handling disagreement and feedback
Skills for having difficult conversations without shaming or silencing
That’s how you build leaders who can hold space for different views without forcing consensus.
4. Strengthen Your Non-Discrimination Policy
Instead of a vaguely worded DEI statement, focus on:
A clear, inclusive, legally sound non-discrimination policy
Language that protects employees without leaning into political ideology
Processes that are easy to understand and apply
5. Set Communication Guidelines for the Workplace
You can’t control social media. You can set expectations inside your company:
Respectful dialogue
No personal attacks
Professional tone in all workplace forums
Clear consequences for behavior that crosses the line
The goal isn’t to police opinions. It’s to protect the environment where people work.
Inclusion Isn’t a Program. It’s a Posture.
One of my biggest concerns with separate DEI departments is this:
Why is inclusion treated as something separate from HR, Title IX, or core people operations at all?
In a 20,000-person organization I worked for, DEI was its own department — disconnected from HR and the Title IX office. That never made sense to me.
We shouldn’t have:
HR over here, doing “real work”
and DEI over there, having “philosophical conversations”
We should have one unified approach where diversity, equity, and inclusion are:
embedded in how we hire
reflected in how we promote and pay
woven into how we coach, discipline, and terminate
From cradle to grave in the employee lifecycle, inclusion should show up as:
fair systems, consistently applied.
We don’t need another program for that.
We need posture + process.
My Hot Take (And What If You Disagree?)
So here’s the clear stance you might be waiting for:
We don’t need DEI programs.
We need HR that is compliant, consistent, and compassionate.
If your first thought is, “Easy for her to say — she’s a middle-aged white woman with privilege,” you’re entitled to that perspective.
If we sat down together and you really got to know my heart, my experience, my work with employees and employers across many industries and profit margins, I think you’d see this:
It’s not that I don’t value diversity, equity, inclusion, and belonging.
It’s that I believe we’ve swung too far toward performative, politicized programs instead of doing the real foundational work.
You may still disagree. And you know what?
That should be okay.
If we can both bring our full, passionate, thoughtful selves to the workplace, we’re going to create a better work product.
We don’t all have to agree on everything. We do have to:
follow the law
uphold consistent standards
treat people with respect
That’s the work of HR.
The HR Standard I’m Committed To
From my perspective, HR doesn’t need to be loud on every cultural issue.
You will not hear me publicly weighing in on every political headline, because:
I am not well-versed enough on every issue to speak with authority — and I’m not going to pretend to be.
What I am committed to is this:
Compliant – following state and federal HR laws
Consistent – applying policies fairly and predictably
Compassionate – remembering that people are people, not just positions
That’s my lane. And I stay in it on purpose.
Want Help Building Inclusive HR Foundations Without the Drama?
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inclusive
protective
simple
and drama-free
…then this program was built for you.
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🎧 And if you haven’t yet, listen to this full episode of Don’t Waste the Chaos for the complete story and deeper context.
Legal Disclaimer: I am not an attorney. Always consult your own legal counsel when dealing with HR, compliance, or employment law issues in your business.
