EP 97: The Death of Employee Loyalty (And How HR Can Fix It)
We talk a lot about quiet quitting and “nobody wants to work anymore.”
But what if employee loyalty didn’t just quietly disappear?
What if we killed it—one policy, one broken promise, one missed conversation at a time?
I’ve been working in HR and People Ops since 2008. I’ve sat inside organizations that treated people like a number. I’ve worked with leaders who believed everyone was replaceable. And I’ve also seen teams where you could almost do anything and still keep your job.
Across all of those environments, one truth has stayed the same:
The hardest part of business is never the product. It’s the people.
And right now, we are facing a loyalty crisis that is not just a “Gen Z thing,” or a “young people don’t want to work” problem.
It’s a trust problem.
And HR has a huge opportunity to help fix it.
How We Broke the “Loyalty Contract”
The old, unspoken deal used to sound like this:
“You give us 30+ years of your life. In exchange, we give you stability, benefits, a pension, and a gold watch at the end.”
That era is gone.
My dad has been self-employed since I was 5. My brother has been with the same company since he was 18 and is now in his late 40s. That kind of tenure still exists—but it’s the exception, not the rule.
Here’s what’s changed:
Pensions disappeared.
Fully paid benefits vanished.
“We’re a family” gave way to layoffs and restructuring.
The implicit contract shifted. But many employers didn’t update their expectations. So employees did:
“If you treat me like I’m replaceable, I’ll behave like this is just a paycheck.”
Meanwhile:
In the U.S., only around 31% of employees are engaged at work.
Globally, it drops to about 21%.
Companies with highly engaged employees see up to a 21% boost in profitability and dramatically lower turnover.
So loyalty didn’t just “die.”
We accidentally trained people out of it.
When Policies Replaced Relationships
Over the last 15–20 years, HR systems have evolved fast—especially in larger organizations.
A lot of that evolution has been positive: better compliance, less risk, cleaner documentation.
But somewhere along the way, many companies started using policies as a substitute for leadership.
An employee abused a benefit → we wrote a 3-page policy.
One person took advantage of flexible time → we locked it down for everyone.
A mistake happened → instead of coaching, we added more rules.
Pretty soon, your employee handbook is a mini legal code.
And your people feel it.
They start to think:
“You don’t trust me. You’re managing me, not leading me.”
We broke loyalty by trying to manage human behavior with documents instead of conversations.
How HR Became the Villain
Let’s just say it plainly:
In a lot of organizations, HR is seen as the policy police.
The company’s lawyer.
The people you only see when:
You’re in trouble
Someone’s being “talked to”
There’s a new rule you have to follow
HR accidentally became the enforcer of the rules, not the builder of trust.
That perception builds walls:
Employees stop being honest.
Leaders only loop HR in when there’s a crisis.
HR is exhausted, reactive, and always “cleaning up messes” instead of preventing them.
And here’s the kicker:
In many organizations, leadership teams are seen the exact same way.
“You only show up when there’s a problem. So why should I open up to you when things are hard?”
If that’s the environment, loyalty doesn’t stand a chance.
What Real Loyalty Looks Like in 2025 (It’s Not Blind Obedience)
Employee loyalty today is not:
“I’ll stay here forever no matter what.”
“I never question leadership.”
“I owe the company my life because they gave me a job.”
That’s not loyalty.
That’s fear. Or stagnation.
Real loyalty in this season looks like this:
Employees feel: Seen. Safe. Supported.
1. Seen
They know someone:
Notices their effort
Knows their name and their story
Cares about their experience at work
Being “seen” shows up in:
Regular check-ins
Real performance conversations
Leaders walking around and saying hello (not just hiding in offices)
2. Safe
Safe doesn’t mean “no accountability.”
It means:
It’s safe to speak up.
It’s safe to make a mistake and not be shamed.
It’s safe to be a human who has kids, aging parents, and a real life outside of work.
We don’t become “non-parents,” “non-spouses,” or “non-caregivers” at 8:00 a.m. just because we clocked in.
If employees feel like their real life is an inconvenience, they will mentally clock out long before they ever resign.
3. Supported
Support looks like:
Clear career pathways (if they want to grow).
Real development opportunities (training, coaching, workshops).
Feedback that’s timely, honest, and useful.
I hear leaders say all the time:
“We don’t do formal performance reviews; we just give real-time feedback.”
Then I ask employees,
“When’s the last time you got specific, helpful feedback?”
Most of the time, they can’t remember.
If it’s not intentional, it’s not consistent.
The Simple Framework: Listen First → Act Second → Lead Always
You don’t fix loyalty with a ping-pong table and pizza Fridays.
You fix it with boring, consistent, humble-efficient systems that send a clear message:
“We see you. We care. We’re investing in you.”
Here’s a framework you can use:
1. Listen First: Stay Interviews & Real Conversations
Most companies do exit interviews.
But by then, it’s too late.
Instead, put stay interviews on the calendar:
Once or twice a year
15–30 minutes
Coffee, a walk, or a relaxed Teams/Zoom chat
Ask questions like:
What keeps you here?
What makes your job hard right now?
What would make your work experience even better?
Is there a skill you’d love to grow this year?
Then—and this part matters—take notes (after the conversation, not during like a court reporter) and look for patterns.
Use AI if you want: dump the anonymized notes in and ask for themes.
Then tell your team:
“Here’s what we heard.
Here’s what we’re going to celebrate.
Here are 1–3 things we’re going to work on together.”
Listening without action erodes trust.
Listening with visible action builds it.
2. Act Second: Low-Lift Plays That Move the Needle
You do not need a 42-page “culture initiative.”
Start small. Start simple. Start consistently.
Here are a few low-lift, high-impact plays:
✅ MBWA – Management By Walking Around
Put 30 minutes a week on your calendar: “MBWA.”
If you’re in-office: get up, walk around, say hello.
If you’re remote: send 3–5 quick personal check-in messages on Teams/Slack/Email.
Not a performance review. Not an interrogation. Just:
“Hey, how’s your week going? Anything making your work harder than it needs to be?”
If your employees stiffen up when you walk through, that’s data. You might be scarier than you think.
✅ Weekly or Monthly Kudos
Put 30 minutes a week on your calendar: “Kudos.”
Think of a few moments you’ve seen someone do something well.
Send a quick note, card, or Slack message:
“I noticed how you handled that client situation yesterday. Thank you—that really reinforced who we say we are.”
71% of employees say more recognition would make them less likely to leave. It doesn’t have to be fancy. It just has to be sincere and specific.
✅ Better Onboarding (30/60/90)
We say we want employees to be:
Professional
Reliable
Comfortable with tech
Then we:
Have a messy first day
Don’t have logins ready
Offer no clear plan for the first 30–90 days
A structured onboarding plan can lead to:
50% higher retention
62% increased productivity
You don’t need a giant LMS to start. Just answer:
What should they know by Day 1?
What should they be comfortable with by Day 30?
What can they own by Day 60–90?
Then write it down. Review it with them. Check in.
✅ Monthly Development Check-Ins
Ask your direct reports once a month:
What are 2–3 highlights from this month?
What are 1–2 obstacles or low points?
What’s one thing you want to get better at over the next 30 days?
You don’t need a giant form. You need curiosity and consistency.
3. Lead Always: Model What You Want to Multiply
Here’s the hard truth for leaders:
You cannot demand loyalty you have not earned.
HR cannot “fix culture” while leadership:
Is invisible
Is misaligned
Is inconsistent
Employees are watching:
How you treat them when they need time off
How you respond when they make a mistake
How you talk about them when they’re not in the room
Those are micro moments with macro impact.
I like to say:
Be hard on policy, but soft on people.
That means:
Clear expectations
Fair standards
Strong boundaries
And also:
Grace for being human
Compassion in hard seasons
Honesty about your own mistakes
I’ve watched organizations cut turnover from the high 20s to single digits by doing nothing more “sexy” than:
Monthly development check-ins
Basic manager training
A simple recognition system (kudos, milestone bonuses, small awards that actually mean something)
Loyalty is not mythical.
It’s measurable. And it’s built one honest human moment at a time.
You Can’t Outsource Loyalty
As an outsourced HR partner, I can:
Help you build systems
Create clean policies
Design your onboarding
Train your managers
What I can’t do is:
Show up in your place as a leader
Care more about your people than you do
Earn the trust you’re not willing to invest in
If your best employee walked in tomorrow and said they were leaving, ask yourself honestly:
Are they leaving you or the environment you’ve created?
Employee loyalty isn’t dead.
It’s just disconnected.
We built systems that expect loyalty
without building relationships that deserve it.
The good news?
You can start reconnecting it this month—with one stay interview, one walk-around, one honest conversation at a time.
Want Help Building the Systems That Create Loyalty?
If you’re ready to stop guessing and start building an HR foundation that actually supports loyalty, here are a couple of next steps:
Mini HR Audit (HR Health Check)
Get a snapshot of what’s healthy, what’s risky, and what to fix first.
👉saltandlightadvisors.com/hrauditHR in a Box (12-Month HR Foundation Program)
A practical, done-with-you HR buildout for small businesses that want real structure without losing heart.
👉saltandlightadvisors.com/hrinabox
And if you want to feel better while you’re leading all this change (because being a business owner/leader is no joke), you can try my favorite NAD+ supplement from Rho Nutrition. I swear by it for energy and healthy aging.
Use code KERRIROBERTS at checkout for 15% off:
👉 https://rhonutrition.com/kerriroberts
Leadership in this season can feel like chaos.
But the work is worth it.
So don’t waste the chaos.
Embrace it.
